numérotrois

Doing Stuff In My Room

“the new feeling that people have about guilt is not something that can be privately assigned to some individual, but is, rather, something shared by everybody, in some mysterious way.” (61)

Well, my work is clearly something about [my] private life made public, since it is a film of stuff I do in my room, by myself. I saw this quote/passage relating to my work and vice versa because guilt is one of those hefty gray-cloud feelings that may be associated with others like fear or anxiety, and these are sentiments that are more-so private than public-oriented. My work, more or less, focuses on this private sphere turned public, the direct result of my rolling camera. Anxiety may be sensed as I sit down on my bed with my headphones in, as well as apprehension, when I looks straight into the camera. Are my burdening feelings mitigated because others are watching me experience them, so I am not alone in all this? Or are they amplified because there is a more distinguished divide of me against them? How do we deal with these feelings that can be so heavily individualized after we know so many others have encountered the same exact thing?

“The past went that-a-way. When faced with a totally new situation, we tend always to attach ourselves to the objects, to the flavor of the most recent past.” (73)

I felt that this passage connects the most with the embedded photographs and the accompanied zooms and outs in certain parts of them. The photographs are of objects (except for my nose, but even then, it is a photograph of my nose) and the camera, or actually the editing, zooms all about, seemingly, in an effort to search for something. It is the same object/photograph, and the zooming everywhere might mean we, the viewers, are looking so hard to find some sort of answer, solution, or idea to whatever problem or reality we must deal with. I feel like we tend to always look towards these things that are artifacts of our time, for the purpose of trying to see and understand the processes that went into creating these objects that are physically manifest, in hope of using those processes and energies for our own agendas, that require of us something that we feel we cannot conjure from just ourselves.